Mayor Simpson
by WhyYouLittle35
Summary: When Homer wins a golf contest thiny, and becomes mayor for a day, who knows what the heck he will! Will he make people get him donuts? Make Flanders his slave? MAYBE! FIND OUT! R&R PLEASE! (Language bad)
1. 75 off mini golf

Applause can be heard as Lisa steps up to a stage.  
  
"Lisa Simpson, you have won this award for..." Lisa was dreaming and woke up, thanks to her alarm clock. She got up and looked at her alarm clock that seemed to always go off at the wrong time. 7:30 a.m. It was a beautiful Saturday morning. She walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. She wished it was Monday, just so she could go to school. She would rather be there. She combed her hair a bit and walked into her room. She stared out the window.  
  
"Lisa, Bart, time for breakfast! We're having toast and eggs!" Marge called up to her children.  
  
"Okay dokay!" Bart said as he ran past Lisa's room, "Bet I could beat you downstairs!"  
  
"Dream on!" Lisa said as she ran behind Bart down the stairs. Bart and Lisa ran into the kitchen. Maggie had already started eating, and Marge was cooking more breakfast.  
  
"Hey mom, where's Homer?" Bart said as he sat down.  
  
"Hmm, I guess he isn't awake yet." Marge said as Homer walked in slowly. Marge set the paper down on the table and Homer looked at it. He stared at it, and turned to the next page.  
  
"Well I hear today is going to be even hotter than yesterday." Marge said as she gazed out the window to the Flanders as they were playing in the sprinkler.  
  
"Ooo! It's a coupon for free Aunt Jemima® Syrup. D'oh! Hmm, another coupon! Lets see, 50% off Kraft® macaroni-and-cheese! Lets see, in the shape of, The Happy Little Elves?! The hell with that! WOW! A coupon for mini golf! Lets see, 75% off mini golf. OOO! There are 3 coupons!" Homer said as he looked at Lisa and Bart.  
  
"CAN WE GO DAD?" Lisa asked excitedly.  
  
"Why sure honey." Homer said as he devoured his eggs.  
  
(Later at Krusty Burger)  
  
"Hello, I would like to get 75% off my golf game please!" Homer said as he went up to a window.  
  
"Uh..." The guy said as he opened his mouth.  
  
"**ANYDAY NOW**!!!" Homer said as he slammed his hand on the counter.  
  
"But sir..."  
  
"**NOW**!" Homer said as Lisa tugged on his shirt, "What?"  
  
"Dad, this is Krusty Burger." Lisa said as she blushed from the embarrassment of her dad.  
  
"I knew that." Homer said as he acted like he was joking.  
  
"Dad! I want a Krusty Burger!" Bart said to Homer.  
  
"Me too!" Lisa said.  
  
"Alright, 3 Krusty Burgers please." Homer said as he handed the cashier some money.  
  
"Okay. Uh, sir, this isn't real money."  
  
"Sure it is! Its one of those new 2004 dollars!" Homer said as he held a green crayon behind his back.  
  
(Sir Putt-A-Lott's)  
  
"Ew, what a dump!" Homer said as he drove by the golf place. "I'm glad that isn't where we are golfing."  
  
"Um dad, that _**IS**_ where we are golfing." Lisa said.  
  
"D'oh!"

"Hmm, is says press here." Bart said as he pressed a button on a TV in the lobby.  
  
"... Hi, I'm Troy McClure; you might remember me from such films as, 'You, me, and that hotdog.' Or, 'Cut to the cheese.' I'm here to tell you that you came golfing on the right weekend! You see, on the bonus hole, right after hole 18; you can win a day to be Mayor! Right here with us is Mayor Quimby!"  
  
"Hello."  
  
"So tell us mayor, why would put up for a contest like this?"  
  
"Well, I have heard a lot of people say they would love to mayor for a day, right at this very spot! (Points up to a sign that reads, "Sir Putt-A- Lott's") _**Actually, it is just so they can get more money, so they can give it to me, besides, it is impossible to win, I blocked the hole with a shoe!"**_ Mayor Quimby whispered quickly into Troy's ear.  
  
"WOW! See you next time!" Troy said as he waved goodbye, along with Quimby.  
  
"Hmm, did you hear what he whispered to Troy? Something with, 'so he can get more money and that it is impossible to win.'" Lisa said as she turned the TV off and turned to Homer and Bart.  
  
"I didn't hear anything." Bart said.  
  
"Me either." Homer said as he scratched his butt.  
  
"Hmm." Lisa said as she rubbed her chin like a detective.


	2. YAY! DADDY IS THE MAYOR

"Hello, sir. Are you with those kids?" the cashier said as he pointed to Bart and Lisa.  
  
"Yes." Homer said.  
  
"That will be-"The cashier said as Homer slapped the coupons onto the counter.  
  
"Ok... these are your three balls." The cashier said as he put a pink, red, and purple ball on the counter.  
  
"I call red!" Bart said as he grabbed it.  
  
"Purple!" Lisa said as she snatched the ball.  
  
"Pink? Um, mister cashier guy, can you get me a different color?" Homer said as he gave a dirty look to the pink ball.  
  
"NO."  
  
"Burn in hell." Homer muttered.  
  
"What was that, sir?"  
  
"Uh, I said... uh... this was a great sell!" Homer said as he pushed the kids out to the course and ran away.  
  
[Hole one]  
  
"Lets see, the par is, what?! 3?!" Homer said as he looked at his score pad.  
  
"Um, dad... is just a flat, straight, normal hole." Lisa said as she pointed to the hole.  
  
(10 minutes later)  
  
"Dad, maybe we should go to the hole." Bart said as he yawned, for Homer did not get the ball in the hole yet!  
  
"Never!" Homer said as he continued hitting the ball.  
  
"Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap."  
  
[Hole 18]  
  
"Finally." Lisa said as she and Bart waited for Homer to hit the ball.  
  
"Okay, Homer, you can do it!" Homer thought to himself. Homer went to hit the ball when Bart yelled, "MISS!" Homer was distracted and sent the ball flying into the air.  
  
"My turn!" Lisa said as she set her ball down.  
  
[Bonus hole]  
  
"Okay. You can do this Homer." Thought to him again. Homer whacked the ball SUPER hard into the mountain where the hole was. Even though he hit it hard, it stayed on the ground. Just like the mayor said, a shoe was blocking it, and Homer's ball turned it away from the hole.  
  
"DAD! Did you read the sign? It says, 'Hit softly.'" Lisa said as she scolded her father.  
  
"Well, since your yelling at dad, I'll take my turn." Bart said as he hit the ball into the mountain. It fell into the hole and triggered off the switch.  
  
"I won!" Homer said as Bart sighed and agreed.  
  
"YAY! DADDY IS THE MAYOR!" Lisa said as a special coupon popped out from the mountain.  
  
"Didn't see that coming." Homer said as he pulled the coupon out.  
  
[Later in the lobby]  
  
"S-s-s-ir how d-d-id you ge-e-t that?"  
  
"Well, duh, I won it! PFFFFFFFFF!" Homer said as he handed the cashier the coupon he had won from the bonus hole.  
  
"Mr. Mayor, sir, some guy named, Homer Jay Simpson has won the contest to win mayor for a day! He really did, tell him to come then? Okay. Mr. Simpson, the mayor wants to talk to you tomorrow at city hall at about 12:30." The cashier said as he handed the coupon to Homer, "You van keep that."  
  
"SWEET!" Homer said as he grabbed the coupon.  
  
[Later in the car]  
  
"WOW! I thought the mayor said it was impossible, guess I need a hearing test!" Lisa said as she lifted hear her shoulders.  
  
"Got that right!" Bart said. 


	3. Think of the things I could do!

"How did it go?" Marge asked as she put a turkey in the oven. Homer held the ticket up to Marge's face and waved it.

"Huh! Homie, you won! I'm so proud of you!" Marge said as she hugged Homer.

Yup, you're looking at the new mayor!" Homer said as the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Marge said as she walked to the door.

"Well, howdy!" Ned Flanders said as she opened the door.

"Hi, Ned, come on in!"

"Ok, but I'll only stay for a moment. Uh, Homer left a big dent in my garage door when he was parking and just left his car there. I'm afraid he is going to have to pay me.

"Oh, Ned I'm so sorry! I'll get him right away! HOMER!" Marge yelled to Homer who was sitting at the kitchen table.

"WHAT?"

"Give me $700." Marge yelled.

"Ok, ok, here you... hey! What is Flanders doing in here?" Homer said as he walked into the foyer.

"You crashed into his garage, and left your car there too."

"OK" Homer said as he walked outside, got into the pinkish sedan, and drove it over to his driveway.

"There! Problem solved, now go away!" Homer said as he pushed Ned outside.

"But what about my..." Ned said as Homer slammed the door on him.

"Moocher!" Homer said as he walked back into the kitchen.

(Later at diner)

"So dad, what are you going to do while mayor?" Lisa asked as she dug her fork into her salad.

"Well, I could..." Homer started, but Marge interrupted him.

"Your father is going to pay for Ned's garage door first!" Marge said as she kicked Homer's foot.

"Ned Flanders? Hmm, I'm mayor; he has to do what I say... Think of the things I could do!" Homer said as he sat there daydreaming.

"Homer, are you okay?" Marge asked as Homer put a big smile on his face, then fell to the ground. He was in a coma! Bart went to dial 9-1-1.

"What comes after 9-1?!" Bart said as he panicked.

"Let me do it!" Lisa said as she grabbed the phone and pressed 1.

"Ugh, hello?"

"My dad went to sleep and wont wake up!!!!!" Lisa said as Bart ran back into the dining room.

"Well, obviously you have to dump a bucket of water on him." The nurse on the other line said and hung-up.

"Oh, that's easy!" Lisa said as she hung the phone up and walked away.


End file.
